Good morning. It’s Tuesday, June 10 — and if your body is present but your soul is somewhere between 2016 and your last vacation, welcome. You’re among friends.

Today in history: In 1935, Alcoholics Anonymous was founded — the OG support group that proved you can turn your rock bottom into a regularly scheduled meeting with bad coffee and good intentions. What started with two guys talking sobriety turned into a global fellowship with more steps than a Fitbit challenge. No shade — we love a rebrand. 

Anyway, cheers (with seltzer) to that. Whether you’re detoxing from booze, sugar, screen time, or just people — we support your journey. Even if your higher power today is coffee. Here’s to a clear head, a semi-clear calendar, and a week that doesn’t try anything funny. Happy scrolling. Let’s get into it.

Today’s stories:

• Dutch baboons accidentally record viral videos

• Warner Bros. Discovery plans company split

• 9th-century sheep-gut condom in museum

• Mysterious space object flashes regularly

• Trump cuts California high-speed funding

• L’Oréal expands skincare empire further

• WWDC 2025 dazzles with translucency

• Amazon tests humanoid delivery robots

• HIV hiding spot potentially discovered

• Baboons walk together for friendship

• Vatican powers operations with solar

• Robinhood snubbed by S&P 500

  and more…

Stocks ticked higher Monday after the first day of renewed US-China trade talks ended on a surprisingly positive note. Hopes of easing tensions gave markets a lift, with the S&P 500 up 0.1% and now just over 2% shy of its record high. The Nasdaq added 0.3%, while the Dow stayed flat, waiting to see if diplomacy turns into actual progress.

_____

Robinhood Gets Left on Read by the S&P 500

Robinhood stock just took a 6% dip after the S&P 500 basically said, “Not you.” Hopes were high that the online brokerage would be added to the index during this quarter’s reshuffle — spoiler: no changes were made. The company had been riding a stock rally, hitting its highest price since its chaotic 2021 debut. Even Bank of America called it a “prime candidate.” But the S&P said nah, leaving Robinhood standing outside the party with its $66B market cap and sad little app. AppLovin also took a hit because people thought it might get in too. Moral of the story: betting on stock index gossip is risky.

_____

Trump pulls plug on California’s high-speed daydream. The Trump administration wants to yank $4 billion in federal funds from California’s high-speed rail project — the one that’s been chugging along slower than a broken Amtrak. The feds say the plan is years behind, billions over budget, and basically a taxpayer-funded fever dream. Originally meant to connect SF to LA in under 3 hours, the project has since been scaled back to a “starter” line in the Central Valley. Still, California insists the dream is alive, with state funding and a lot of optimism holding the whole thing together.

L’Oréal buys its way deeper into your skincare routine. L’Oréal just scooped up a majority stake in British skincare brand Medik8, continuing its quest to own your entire bathroom shelf. The deal is rumored to be worth around €1 billion — which is apparently the going rate for wrinkle cream that’s TikTok-famous. This is just the latest move in L’Oréal’s skincare shopping spree. In the past year alone, they’ve grabbed Aesop (yes, the fancy soap one), Korean brand Dr.G, and a slice of Galderma — not to mention a beauty license for Miu Miu, because why not? Their “Dermatological Beauty Division” already includes heavy-hitters like La Roche-Posay, CeraVe, Vichy, SkinCeuticals, and Skinbetter Science. The division made over €7 billion last year, driven by social media-fueled obsession with anything that says “clinical” on the label.

Warner Bros. Discovery is breaking up with itself. Warner Bros. Discovery is breaking into two companies by 2026: one for streaming and studios (HBO, Max, DC, etc.), and one for cable leftovers like CNN, TNT Sports, and Discovery+. They say it’s about “strategic flexibility,” which usually means Wall Street wanted something shinier. No word yet on who’s in charge of what, but expect more app rebrands, merger speak, and corporate soul-searching. Basically: the divorce is official, and both sides want custody of your screen time.

WWDC 2025: More See-Through Stuff, Less Innovation

At WWDC 2025, Apple revealed iOS 26 (yep, they changed the naming system) and a bunch of “Liquid Glass” design updates — think more translucency, rounded corners, and see-through toolbars. It’s Apple’s biggest design glow-up in years, and yes, it looks like Vision Pro had a baby with iOS. They’ve also added a sprinkle of AI (of course), including custom Genmoji made with ChatGPT, live message translation, and hold music muting in the new Phone app. Messages gets polls, colored backgrounds, and spam segregation. Apple Maps now tracks your favorite coffee shop like a clingy ex, and Wallet will hold your digital ID along with updated boarding passes. Basically: shinier screens, smarter features, more reasons to pretend your old phone doesn’t work anymore.

_____

Space object sends weird signals every 44 minutes. Astronomers found a space object that flashes at Earth every 44 minutes like clockwork — and no one knows what it is. Named ASKAP J1832-0911 (rolls right off the tongue), it was spotted using Australia’s ASKAP telescope and NASA’s super-fancy Chandra X-ray observatory. The thing sends out two-minute bursts of radio and X-rays and then ghosts us for 42 minutes. Scientists think it might be a dead star, or a weird magnetic duo of dying stars — but honestly, they have no clue. “Like nothing we’ve ever seen,” they said, which is astronomer-speak for wtf is that? It could mean new physics. Or just that aliens have terrible timing.

Amazon testing robots that might steal jobs and joy. Amazon is reportedly building a “humanoid park” to test robots that could one day replace delivery drivers — yes, like full-on, human-shaped bots that spring out of vans with your bubble wrap and cat food. The company’s working on the AI brains, but the robot bodies are from outside vendors. For now, they’re training these metal interns on an indoor obstacle course in San Francisco that’s the size of a coffee shop. Cute. Until one faceplants carrying a PlayStation. If all goes to plan, these humanoids could soon be riding in Amazon vans, ready to drop your package and your sense of job security at the door.

HIV hiding spot finally found. Big news from Melbourne: scientists might have figured out how to drag HIV out of its hiding place. The virus is infamous for tucking itself into white blood cells and ghosting both the immune system and meds. Classic toxic behavior. But now, researchers at the Doherty Institute used mRNA tech (yep, the same stuff from your COVID shot) to shine a spotlight on the virus. If it can be seen, it can be zapped — meaning we might finally be on the road to a real cure. The scientists say they’re “overwhelmed.” Understandable.

Science confirms: baboons are just clingy. Turns out baboons aren't forming military-style lines to avoid predators or fight over snacks. According to researchers at Swansea University, they just like walking next to their buddies. Using GPS trackers and way too much academic energy, scientists studied baboons in South Africa and discovered their so-called “progressions” are less about strategy, more about social vibes. So no, they’re not guarding the weak or plotting jungle takeovers. They’re just out there, strolling with the squad.

Vatican goes solar. The Vatican is now officially running on sunlight. Pope Francis’ dream of a fully solar-powered Holy HQ is real, thanks to a massive solar farm outside Rome. The new agrivoltaic plant (yep, solar panels + crops = agrivoltaics) powers everything from Vatican Radio to the Pope’s espresso machine. The 1,000-acre site was already used for Vatican broadcasting, so they just slapped some panels on it. The project took only six months — because apparently heaven helps you skip Italian bureaucracy. The Pope says it’s a model for “climate neutrality.” Also, it’s kind of a flex: your church runs on donations, his runs on sunshine.

Dutch Monkeys Out-Vlog You Again

A woman dropped her phone at a Dutch zoo, and the baboons did what any modern primate would do: made content. After the phone landed in their enclosure, the baboons grabbed it, pressed record, and served up seven chaotic clips — mostly of dirt, but also some accidental selfies. The woman couldn’t get her phone back right away (zoo rules, apparently), but when she checked her iCloud later, the footage was there. Naturally, she posted it to TikTok. The baboons are now viral stars with more views than your cousin’s social media career.

_____

19th-сentury sheep-gut condom gets museum debut. Starting June 3, 2025, the Rijksmuseum will proudly display a rare 1830 condom — yes, you read that right — featuring a risqué scene of a nun and three aroused clergymen. It’s likely made from a sheep’s appendix and was probably a brothel souvenir. The etching mocks both celibacy and Greek mythology, because why not. The caption reads “Voilà mon choix” — translation: “This is my choice” — as the nun picks her favorite holy man. Subtle. The museum says it bought the item to highlight 19th-century sexuality and prostitution, a “neglected topic” in their archives. You don’t say. It’ll be part of a broader exhibit on sexual health and syphilis panic — because history wasn’t all corsets and candles.

_____

TikTok of the day: watch here

We wanna be friends with your friends

Share Increadible Newsletter (increadible.com) with your friends and stay informed anxiety-free together