Welcome to the grand finale—the final stretch of December, also known as the month of hope, last-minute charity, and stressful proposals. Most marriage proposals happen in December (specifically, the week before Christmas), and nonprofits pull in nearly half their online donations during this week. Coincidence? We think not.

As we limp toward New Year’s with vague resolutions and leftover cookies, let’s embrace the madness. Raise a glass to the wins, laugh off the losses, and head into 2025 fueled by hope and carbs.

Today’s stories:

• Vanguard strikes deal with regulators over bank stakes

• California to ban new gas-powered car sales by 2035

• Why tech giants are betting big on nuclear power

• Chess champion disqualified for wearing jeans

• The Saks-Neiman merger is official

• Do dogs need winter jackets?

  and more…

Tech took a tumble Friday, pulling markets down, but the holiday week still ended on a high note for major indexes. The Dow snapped a six-session winning streak, slipping 333.59 points to 42,992.21. The S&P 500 slid 1.11% to 5,970.84, while the Nasdaq dropped 1.49% to 19,722.03, hit hard by Tesla’s 5% dip and Nvidia’s 2% decline.

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Saks and Neiman Marcus Tie the Knot in $2.7B Luxury Merger

The Saks-Neiman merger is official, with Saks Global acquiring Neiman Marcus Group for $2.7 billion. The deal combines Neiman Marcus, Bergdorf Goodman, Saks Fifth Avenue, and Saks Off 5th under one shiny, new luxury empire worth $7 billion in retail real estate. Richard Baker, Saks Global’s executive chairman, called it a “transformative moment,” promising to “redefine the luxury shopping experience” with data, innovation, and fancy properties. Basically, it’s one big high-end shopping spree for them—and probably for you, if you’ve got the budget.

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Biden gives California the green light to ban gas cars. The Biden administration approved California’s plan to ban new gas-powered car sales by 2035. The EPA granted waivers for stricter emissions rules, dismissing opponents’ arguments as hot air. Trump, naturally, isn’t thrilled. He’s promised to roll back these rules, calling California’s car standards “ridiculous.” The EV fight just hit the fast lane, and it’s about to get messy.

Trump asks Supreme Court to pause TikTok ban. President-elect Donald Trump has asked the US Supreme Court to put the brakes on a TikTok ban, claiming he wants to “resolve it politically” after taking office. His lawyer filed a brief basically saying, “Let’s not ban TikTok, okay?” The ban stems from a law forcing TikTok’s Chinese parent company, ByteDance, to sell to a US firm by January 19—just one day before Trump takes over. Looks like the TikTok clock is ticking, and Trump’s trying to hit snooze.

Vanguard strikes deal with regulators over bank stakes. Vanguard and the FDIC reached an agreement to tighten rules on how the investment giant can hold big stakes in major U.S. banks. The deal ensures Vanguard stays in its lane as a passive investor and doesn’t meddle in bank decisions, even when snapping up large shares through its funds. It’s all about keeping asset management giants like Vanguard and BlackRock from playing puppet master with the country’s biggest financial institutions. 

Bezos’ Blue Origin Finally Gets Its Rocket License

Blue Origin, Jeff Bezos’ rocket baby, just got FAA approval to launch its New Glenn rocket. After years of trailing SpaceX, Bezos is now officially in the space race, competing alongside Elon Musk and United Launch Alliance for national security missions. Guess Bezos got tired of watching Musk steal the spotlight. Time to see if Blue Origin can actually go the distance—or just keep burning through Bezos’ billions.

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Why tech giants are betting big on nuclear power. Microsoft, Amazon, Google, and Meta are diving headfirst into nuclear power—because apparently, running AI and data centers that gobble up more energy than entire cities isn’t sustainable with just solar panels and good intentions.

“It’s 24/7 carbon-free power,” says Google’s Michael Terrell. Translation: nuclear can handle their AI ambitions without turning the planet into toast. After years of shunning it over safety fears and Hollywood-inspired meltdowns, nuclear is now Big Tech’s shiny new toy in the energy game.

Experts are calling this the “nuclear revival.” We call it Big Tech realizing their AI dreams don’t run on good vibes and wind turbines alone.

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Chess Champion Disqualified for Wearing Jeans at Chess Tournament

Magnus Carlsen, the world’s top chess player, got the boot from a major NYC tournament for committing the ultimate crime: wearing jeans. FIDE rules say denim is a no-go, and despite already playing several rounds, officials fined him $200 and demanded a wardrobe change. Carlsen refused, offering to switch outfits the next day, but when that didn’t fly, he called it “a matter of principle” and walked out. Later, he posted a cheeky “outfit of the day” pic featuring the controversial jeans.

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Internet words of 2024: the year English went full brain rot. 2024 gave us slang like “hawk tuah” and proved that the internet is a language factory running on chaos. Linguist Adam Aleksic says only low-key, useful words survive—everything else is meme trash. As we wrap up a year rich in words (and disappointment), here’s to the gems we’ll regret in five years.

Do dogs need winter jackets? Not all dogs are built for snow days. While huskies and malamutes laugh at the cold, thin-coated breeds like whippets shiver at the thought. Vet Nancy Kay says many modern pups need jackets because centuries of domestication turned wolves into house dogs with wardrobes. Smaller breeds, especially, can’t handle freezing temps without layers and booties. So, sure, matching parkas with your pup might look ridiculous, but for many dogs, it’s survival, not style.

Pro pickleball players now out-earn WNBA stars. Pickleball has leveled up. Women on the PPA Tour and Major League Pickleball now average $260,000 a year—more than WNBA’s top earners and double the NWSL average. With $30 million in total salaries (not including endorsements), this backyard sport turned pro is cashing in big-time. 

Bird Photographer of the Year 2024: yes, this is a thing. The Bird Photographer of the Year 2024 winners were picked from a jaw-dropping 23,000 entries because apparently, snapping bird pics is serious business. The top honor went to Patricia Homonylo, whose winning photo features birds tragically taken out by windows. Beautiful? Yes. Heartbreaking? Also yes. 

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TikTok of the day: watch here