Good morning.

It’s Thursday, November 13 — yes, Thursday. We double-checked the calendar this time. Last issue, we were confidently living in Monday when it was… Tuesday. Time isn’t real, deadlines blur, and we’re one Excel crash away from a collective meltdown.

Anyway, the coffee’s strong, the brain cells are few, and we still pulled this one off. So grab your mug, stretch those overworked shoulders, and enjoy the read — it’s the right day for it.

Today’s stories:

• The Flatiron Building’s turning into million-dollar condos

• Mercedes F1 zooms into billionaire collector status

• Bat-inspired drones fly smarter than rescue teams

• SoftBank swaps Nvidia billions for OpenAI dreams

• Australia discovers Lucifer, the devil-horned bee

• China poaches U.S. talent with open-door visas

• Toy Story 5 pits Woody against screen time

• America’s losing real pasta — blame tariffs

• Ronaldo calls time on his legendary career

• Apple sells a $230 phone sock. Yes, really

• Hybrids are hot — Toyota’s cashing in big

• Meta’s top AI genius quits to go rogue

  and more…

Wall Street’s feeling relief — and a little rebound. US stock futures ticked higher Wednesday night as Washington finally got its act together to end the record 43-day government shutdown.

Dow futures rose 0.2%, S&P 500 edged up 0.1%, and the Nasdaq 100 added 0.3%. The House passed the reopening bill 222–209, and the White House says Trump’s ready to sign.

The shutdown may be ending, but the hangover’s not. The Congressional Budget Office estimates it’ll shave $11 billion off GDP by 2026 — proof that even short-term chaos can leave a long-term dent.

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Italian Pasta Faces Extinction in U.S. Aisles

American grocery shelves might soon lose their Italian pasta — the real stuff, not the “Italian-inspired” boxes made in New Jersey. Italy’s biggest pasta makers, including La Molisana, say they’ll stop exporting to the U.S. after new tariffs and antidumping duties push costs up a brutal 107%. That means fusilli, rigatoni, and spaghetti straight from Italy could vanish by January. The U.S. Commerce Department hit 13 Italian companies with a 92% antidumping duty, on top of Trump’s existing 15% EU import tariff. Even for Italy’s top pasta boss, Giuseppe Ferro, that’s too much dough to swallow. The move’s turned into a mini trade war between Washington and Rome — over carbs. If nothing changes, your next bowl of “authentic” pasta may come from Kansas wheat and American regret.

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SoftBank dumps Nvidia. SoftBank just sold its entire $5.8 billion Nvidia stake — again — to fund a $30 billion crush on OpenAI. CEO Masayoshi Son is basically swapping one golden child of AI for another. Nvidia dipped 2% after the announcement, probably offended. SoftBank made $16.6 billion in profit last quarter — its best since 2022 — mostly thanks to OpenAI’s soaring valuation. Son called it “reallocating capital,” which is a polite way of saying: we sold the winner to buy the hype.

Toyota’s $10B glow-up. Toyota just fired up a brand-new $13.9 billion battery plant in North Carolina, its first outside Japan, and casually threw in another $10 billion in U.S. investments. CEO Tetsuo Ogawa called it a “pivotal moment,” which is CEO-speak for please clap. While everyone else is still trying to make EVs cool again, Toyota’s just riding high on hybrid demand — they own more than half the U.S. market. EV hype may be fading, but apparently, hybrids are the new black. So, to recap: new batteries, $10B more cash, and a strong whiff of “we told you so” from Toyota.

Mercedes F1 could be worth $6B. Mercedes F1 boss Toto Wolff is reportedly selling about 5% of his stake in a deal that would value the team at $6 billion. The buyer is George Kurtz, the CrowdStrike CEO and racing enthusiast whose company already sponsors Mercedes. The sale would bring Kurtz into Wolff’s holding company, which owns a third of the team alongside Ineos and Mercedes-Benz. The deal isn’t sealed yet, but the $6 billion tag would make Mercedes the most valuable F1 team ever — proof that “Drive to Survive” turned racing into a luxury asset class.

Beijing opens the door while Washington slams it. China just launched its own version of the U.S. H-1B visa — called the K-visa — to lure foreign tech workers as America tightens its borders. The new visa lets skilled professionals apply even without a job offer, making it way easier to move in and plug into China’s growing tech scene. Beijing’s betting big on global talent to boost its ambitions in AI, semiconductors, and robotics — basically, anything that could help it beat the U.S. at tech. The timing is no accident: with Trump’s immigration clampdowns and H-1B fees now hitting $100,000, a lot of frustrated engineers and grad students are eyeing China instead. China’s still fighting a homegrown brain drain, but the new visa is a power move to flip the script — turning “Made in China” into “Hired by China.”

The $230 Sock No One Asked For

Apple just dropped the “iPhone Pocket” (basically a $230 sock for your phone). The internet immediately lost it. Hard to argue. Apple insists it’s “inspired by a piece of cloth” (deep), and co-designed with Issey Miyake — the same label behind Steve Jobs’ famous black turtlenecks. So yes, it’s minimalist. Also yes, it’s ridiculous. Marques Brownlee called it a “litmus test” for blind Apple loyalty. Translation: if you buy this, you’ll buy anything.

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Meet the batbots: AI drones with super hearing. A researcher at Worcester Polytechnic Institute wants to replace human rescuers with bat-inspired robots. Yep — tiny flying machines that navigate using ultrasound, just like the real thing. They fit in your hand, see in the dark, and don’t complain about bad weather. Professor Nitin Sanket and his team built these palm-sized drones to handle search-and-rescue missions in places too dangerous for humans. They “see” using sound waves filtered through AI — basically high-tech echolocation with a caffeine addiction. The bots were originally inspired by insects and birds — because, as Sanket puts it, “biology does this way better than we can.” After some trial and error (turns out propellers are noisy little jerks), they copied how bats shape sound using special tissues in their noses and ears. The result: smarter, quieter flying robots ready to save the day.

Say hello to the bee from hell. Australia just added another nightmare to its wildlife lineup — a new bee with devil horns, literally named Lucifer.Discovered by researcher Kit Prendergast at Curtin University, the horned insect was found hanging out on a critically endangered wildflower in Western Australia. The species, officially called Megachile (Hackeriapis) lucifer, got its name from its spooky look and, yes, the Netflix show. DNA tests confirmed it’s brand new — no match in any database or museum. Because of course Australia needed one more creature that looks like it crawled out of hell.

Meta’s AI brain goes solo. Meta’s top AI brain, Yann LeCun, is reportedly packing up to start his own company. The legendary scientist — NYU professor, Turing Award winner, and one of the godfathers of modern AI — is said to be raising money for a startup focused on “world models,” a type of AI that learns how the world works to predict what happens next. Basically, machines with common sense — or at least better instincts than your average intern. His exit would hit Meta at a rough moment. The company’s been scrambling to keep up with OpenAI, Google, and Anthropic, throwing billions into new projects and even poaching 50 engineers for a new “Meta Superintelligence Lab.” The result: chaos, confusion, and too many labs with too many acronyms. LeCun’s long-term research group, FAIR, has been sidelined amid the corporate shuffle. Now he’s reportedly had enough — choosing startup freedom over Meta meetings.

NYC’s Favorite Landmark Just Got a Price Tag

Manhattan’s famous Flatiron Building — the triangle-shaped icon you’ve seen in a thousand postcards — is officially becoming condos. Yep, soon you’ll be able to live inside the world’s most recognizable geometry problem. Developers are turning the 22-story landmark into 38 luxury apartments, each carved out of spaces with zero right angles. The model unit on the 12th floor features a 60-foot great room, Vermont marble bathrooms, and enough windows to make you forget what privacy feels like. Architect William Sofield reworked the building’s awkward interior to make rooms actually livable (good luck arranging a couch, though). Historic bits are getting recycled — staircase spindles turned into sink legs, boiler scraps reborn as gym art. Because nothing screams “old New York glamour” like upcycled plumbing. The result is half museum, half loft, and fully a math puzzle you can now own for a few million dollars.

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Pixar’s new villain: your kid’s tablet. Pixar’s back with Toy Story 5, and this time the villain isn’t a bear or a spoiled kid — it’s a tablet. The first teaser shows Woody and friends facing a new enemy: “Lilypad,” a frog-shaped screen voiced by Greta Lee, threatening playtime with the tagline, “The age of toys is over.” The movie hits theaters June 19, 2026, three decades after the original Toy Story. The plot seems simple: tech bad, nostalgia good. Conan O’Brien joins as a toilet-training gadget named “Smarty Pants,” because apparently Pixar’s humor now comes with Wi-Fi. It’s less about toys vs. tech and more about Pixar vs. box office recovery — their last film Elio barely made $21 million at debut. The real villain might be streaming fatigue.

Ronaldo confirms his final World Cup run. Cristiano Ronaldo just confirmed the obvious — the 2026 World Cup will be his last. Speaking to CNN, the 39-year-old Portuguese star said he’ll be 41 by then and ready to call it. “I gave everything for football,” he said, which is fair considering he’s been scoring goals since flip phones were a thing. Ronaldo said he’s “enjoying the moment,” but admitted retirement is coming “really soon.” After 25 years, countless trophies, and more records than a Spotify playlist, he’s finally ready to chill — or at least post about chilling.

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TikTok of the day: watch here

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